International Bon Vivant and Raconteur (nick_kaufmann) wrote,
International Bon Vivant and Raconteur

This Looks Like the Best Movie That Has Ever Been Filmed

The above picture is from a new movie called Bitch Slap, and just from this single image I can already tell this movie has everything I could ever want in a film. Big guns. Smoldering wreckage. Nosebleeds. From what I gather, the plot is something of a science fiction-tinged Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, but really, looking at this one image I realize now, finally, that plot is so unimportant.

Let's see what we can piece together from the picture. Red -- that's what I'm calling her -- has a big gun. From the looks of things, she is responsible for the smoldering wreckage behind her (you go, girl!). The nosebleed? That just shows how tough she is. Someone punched her in the face and I bet all she did was flip her hair, fix him with a steely grin and blow him away with that giganto-gun (you still go, girl!). Also, we can gather she has trouble with buttons and enjoys shopping at Frederick's of Hollywood (are you going, girl?).

Seriously, it's like someone made a movie just for me. They telepathically explored all the images in my brain, filmed them exactly as they appeared, and strung them together into a narrative.

The hilariously boob-centric (though still work safe) trailer is available at the movie's equally hilarious website. I swear, the minute that trailer is over you're going to say the same thing I did. Namely, "Oh my God, I have to see this movie!"
Tags: movies
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