If MTV were a person, she would be out of college already, approximately ten years past being a virgin, had her stomach pumped at least once for alcohol poisoning, had at least two pregnancy scares, probably working in an office somewhere but only until her music/art/writing takes off because no way is she going to be doing this for the rest of her life, even though she will be, and engaged to the guy she dumped her college boyfriend for and thinks she's going to marry but knows, deep inside, the fact that they've been engaged for two years now and still haven't set a date is not a good sign.
Luckily, MTV is a TV channel instead, because being a 25-year-old person sucks.
But still...wow. Feeling old now.