March 28th, 2011

Me

The Bachelor Party

My bachelor party this weekend was legendary. My lips are sealed, but I would like to take this opportunity to thank my friends for their generosity and high spirits, especially Mark C. and Jeff G., who planned the evening's festivities, and mssrcrankypants, who went the extra mile (or rather, many extra miles) by coming all the way down from Worcester to help celebrate; Jack Demsey's Pub for the free shots, even if one of the rounds was Southern Comfort; and of course all of Russia, Poland, and the Ukraine.

But most of all I want to thank my sweetie, who was there when I stumbled home at 3:30 in the morning.

Anyway, no, there are no pictures. We all knew better than that. Though I would have loved a shot with that wild llama we wrestled on the Brooklyn Bridge...
Me

The Radical Atheist Islamists Are Coming!

Hours after declaring Sunday that he expects to be running for president within a month, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said he's worried the United States could be “a secular atheist country, potentially one dominated by radical Islamists,” in the foreseeable future.

Wait, what?

Seriously, these politicians don't even know what words mean anymore. Their speeches have become random strings of focus-group buzz words they think will energize the base, devoid of all sense or substance.

I think it's time to press the reset button.