October 14th, 2009


New Phone!

Today I find myself with a fancy new phone from Verizon Wireless! Unlike my old phone, which was cool when I bought it two-plus years ago but now seems like a feeble old dinosaur compared to all the nifty smart phones everyone else has, this one--though also not a smart phone--has the two major things I wish the old one had had.

1) A full QWERTY keyboard. Call me grandpa, but texting on those tiny standard phone keypads was a fucking nightmare. It would take me twenty minutes to write "Okay, I'll see you there" because I had proper spelling, grammar and punctuation pounded into my head as a kid. None of this "OK, C U thr" crap for me, you whippersnappers! Also, I hated how children thirty years younger than me would stare like I was the village idiot and tell me I was doing it wrong because I wasn't texting with both thumbs, and then proceed to school me by typing out a text message with lightning speed as if it were no harder than crossing an empty street. But no more of that! Now I have a real keyboard and can type like a normal person--and much more quickly, too!

2) A camera. My old cell phone came in a version with a camera, but at the time I opted against it. Then, with each misspelled awning and menu item I encountered, I began to seriously regret that decision. Now, at last, I can take pictures on the fly, whenever the inspiration hits. With my luck, of course, I'll never find another misspelled awning or menu item again. In which case, I'll just have to use it to take provocative pictures of myself, post them to Facebook and call myself Darla.

And extra bonus! I only discovered this when I got home and started playing with the new phone, but I can now download ringtones! My old phone didn't have that option. So of course, this is my new ringtone.