September 5th, 2008

Me

"Duck Stamp" Is the New "Rusty Trombone"

People calling a federal phone number to order duck stamps are instead greeted by a phone-sex line, due to a printing error the government says would be too expensive to correct.

The carrier card for the duck stamp transposes two numbers, so instead of listing 1-800-782-6724, it lists 1-800-872-6724. The first number spells out 1-800-STAMP24, while the second number spells out 1-800-TRAMP24.

People calling that second number are welcomed by "Intimate Connections" and enticed by a husky female voice to "talk only to the girls that turn you on," for $1.99 a minute.


"Hello, can I get a duck stamp?"

"Ooooo, you are nasty!"

"Um...what?"

"I don't even know what a duck stamp is! I hope it doesn't get my tight schoolgirl uniform all messy, or I might get a spanking!"

"Hello? Who is this?"

"My name is Amber, and I want you to stamp that dirty duck! Stamp it! Oh yeah, stamp that duck, stamp it good, you stud!"

"I just want to..."

"STAMP IT! STAMP IT! OH!"

"Oh, um, so...do you like duck hunting? We can go sometime--"

"Your bill comes to $18.95."